The single biggest problem in communication…

I couldn’t agree more with this post by Otrazhenie. We assume we know that the other person is thinking or their intentions or their feelings. So often we are completely wrong, but don’t believe we are wrong. We then act on our mistaken assumptions, hurting the relationship and the other person. Don’t assume. Don’t do mind reading. Ask for clarification. Tell them your assumption and ask them if it’s correct. Notice how many times you are wrong. Your relationships will be better for the effort!    Terry Ledford, Ph.D.


You may be surrounded by wonderful, well-meaning people, but only you can know your needs, feelings and purpose. You can listen and learn from others, but you can’t allow them to direct your life. Live your life deliberately!

Life’s Roller Coasters

roller_coasterRoller coasters are fun because we know we will get off soon. We can thrill to the ups and downs and unexpected curves because of the flat part at the end, where we slow down, stop, raise the bar, and get off. The experience is pleasurable because we know that it is temporary.

Life sometimes feels like a roller coaster, with its own ups and downs and unexpected curves. Unfortunately, we often can’t see the flat part at the end where we slow down and return to normalcy. We imagine that our present chaotic ride will go on forever. We dread the next fall and anxiously await the next unexpected turn.

It does seem that negative life events often come in clusters. Just when we’re recovering from a jab in life, we’re struck with a right hook, and we find ourselves reeling and unsteady. Our only goal is to stay on our feet, or to put one foot in front of the other.

When you find yourself in the middle of a cluster of negative life events, you have to hang on tighter and realize that you’re not alone.  When life is unstable, we need to lean on others for assistance, advice, support or just their presence.

We also have to recall past negative clusters and remember that they eventually ended and that we survived. There is a lot of wisdom in the phrase, “This too shall pass.”

Most importantly, remember that the roller coaster had a creator, who knew each twist and turn long before you purchased your ticket. Trust that creator to bring you home to the flat part, where you can slow down, step onto stable ground and breathe a sigh of relief.


Question: When you’ve experienced the ups and downs of life, what steps have you taken to hold on and stay the course?